Five is the magic number…..
by Sunil Bali, Chief Energy Officer, 03-07-11
After bringing a couple in to his “Love Lab”, at the University of Washington, Professor of Psychology Dr John Gottman can predict within a few minutes of watching them interact, with 90% + accuracy whether they’ll stay together or whether they’ll divorce.
How does he do it?
He measures the ratio of positive to negative interactions between the couple e.g., do they criticise one another or say something kind? Move away from one another or stay close….
Gottman found that couples who thrive have at least 5 positive interactions to every 1 negative interaction.
A little appreciation clearly goes a long way, whether it’s with your kids, partner, work colleague or even a stranger.
Gottman’s research shows that when you appreciate someone their value appreciates.
The "appreciation effect" is particularly pronounced in kids. Saying a few positive things to a child when putting the child to sleep has been found to turbo-charge the child’s self esteem, confidence and performance at school.
On another note, the first half of the year has gone. How’s it been for you? Have you achieved what you wanted?
I’ve achieved a lot, but some of it wasn’t what I really wanted because at times, my ladder was up against the wrong wall! I’ve moved my ladder and am flying now and on course to finish writing two more books by the end of this year…..watch this space.
Here’s a 75 second video to get you in the mood for the second half of 2011.
Quotes
If I had to live my life again, I’d make the same mistakes. Only sooner - Tallulah Bankhead
If we take care of the moments, the years will take care of themselves - Maria Edgeworth
The art of life lies in a constant readjustment to your surroundings - Okakura Kakuzo
Television – a medium. So called because it is neither rare nor well done - Ernie Kovacs
Humour
It’s that time of year for school exams and school reports.
Part 1 (Part 2 next week)
Father, to son, "Let me see your report card."
Son, "You can’t. My friend just borrowed it. He wants to scare his parents.”
———-
Teacher: “Who can tell me where Hadrian’s Wall is?"
Pupil:"I expect it’s around Hadrian’s garden!"
———-
Biology teacher: "What happens when the human body is immersed in water?"
Student: "The telephone rings"
———-
Teacher: "What does the 1286BC inscription on the mummy’s tomb indicate?"
Pupil: "Is it the registration number of the car that ran over him?"
———-
Teacher: "Where’s the English Channel?"
Pupil: "I don’t know. My TV doesn’t pick it up."
———-
Angry father: "Just look at this report card! Your friend John doesn’t come home with C’s and D’s
on his report card!"
Son: "No. But he’s different. He’s got really smart parents"
———-
Son: "I failed every subject except for algebra"
Father: "How did you manage not to fail that?"
Son: "I didn’t take algebra."
———-
Teacher: "Johnny, I believe you copied off Jimmy in the exams."
Johnny: "How can you tell?"
Teacher: ‘Wherever Jimmy’s written "I don’t know", next to a question, you’ve put
"Neither do I" ‘.
———-
"I was thrown out of university in my first year. I cheated in the metaphysics exam. I looked within the soul of the boy sitting next to me." – Woody Allen.
———-
Exam question: "Use the word diploma in a sentence".
Pupil: "Our pipes were leaking, so my dad called diploma."
———-
To your success,
Sunil
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